don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
