before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
babies were throwing up all over the place
im about as happy as oj after his trial
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Randomize
