so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
