Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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