youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Randomize