If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
