I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize