I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
