Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize