It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
