But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
