After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
