He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
