My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
