so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
