my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
