you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
