mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
