come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
