"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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