would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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