Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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