Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
