everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
