just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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