yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
