Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
