When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
