hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
