Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize