I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
