and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Randomize