i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
