my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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