Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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