I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
