why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I need to sanitize my soul.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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