I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
