Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
