GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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