***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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