youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize