You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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