no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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