She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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