God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
she told me i tasted like america
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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