Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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