GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
