how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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