THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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