So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
