So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
