Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize