Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
