Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
